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3 in 3 – Simon Bischoff

So we are starting a new segment with Baffle, calling it 3 in 3. The idea is simple; 3 photos from the last 3 months. We are all doing life more or less in the same, big picture kind of way. We all do our work, eat, sleep and climb. But what are the little stories amongst all that?

We reached out to Simon Bischoff to see what he’s been up to, share some photos and tell a story. He took the liberty of completely mucking up our idea from post number one and sent seven photos and a movie. We are ok with that though :). What’s it all worth if you can’t push the boat out a little?

Enjoy Simons 3 in 3 (in 8)

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This Winter I spent a little time in the Blueys hanging out with Jacque and trying his beautiful crack project aptly named ‘Mother Earth. It was all coming together pretty well until a bit of a chilly front came through. With the help of a some whisky and hot wine we stuck it out for a bit but it wasn’t feeling like much of a holiday so thought we’d pop up to Armidale for some warmer weather. Bad idea. Not only is it a long bloody drive, it’s fricken freezing up there as well! I tried this sturdy little roof crack called Dream Catcher put up by Ben Vincent in the Gara Gorge. Such a beautiful place made better by a few close encounters with some spotted quail thrushes on the walk in. Its far from the hardest roof crack i’ve done but I reckon the exit moves on the roof would be up there with the most hideously unpleasant crack sequences around. I should have had a rest a day when I sent it, but I didn’t and as a result I fucked my arm up pretty bad and basically haven’t climbed since!

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I managed to just get back to Tassie just as the covid complications were heating up on the mainland. I was still having trouble with my arm as well as having a knee injury so I bought a Kayak to explore some new sea cliffs in the meantime. The other day I paddled out past Lemon rock on the Freycinet Peninsula. I got caught in some serious chop for about two hours which resulted in me eating my breakfast in reverse. My friend Ellen asked me “why didn’t you just vomit in the water”? Good point. I guess I’d been spitting and dry wrenching for two hours and just didn’t expect anything to come up! I had no idea you could get so sick kayaking!

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Screen Shot 2021 10 29 At 6.43.28 Am
This is a screen grab from the video Simon sent us of his kneebar crunches. He busted through 17.5 in case you were wondering. Seems like a alot! (im not clever enough to know how to compress this file to be uploadable to the site)

That’s me in a paper dress waiting to get an MRI. Haven’t really been able to climb at all for four months. Training for climbing training for climbing training for climbing without being able to hang off stuff or go anywhere is tricky. My project has some barbaric knee bars on it straight out of Tarzan so I’ve developed a core work out called ‘Core of destiny’ which includes some knee bruising knee bar sit-ups on the 35mm dream crack for training. Also been doing a lot of weights and listening to techno in the backyard to keep up my street cred down at the Salamanca markets but the classical guitar guy still treats me with no respect. The MRI turned out some cartilage and bone damage so i’m booked into surgery in December. Fingers crossed for a speedy recovery and return to climbing sometime next year. Those cracks won’t climb them selves.

BD: Thanks Simon. Hopefully surgery goes smoothly and you’re back on the crack sometime soon. In the mean time, take some TravaCalm. Everyone will appreciate it.

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